“Hello everyone. I love you all. I tried to get my driver’s licence but my husband doesn’t like the thought of me driving because he wants my family to look like winners and I’m a woman and he doesn’t like female drivers so I had to sneak around behind his back and I felt really bad because I didn’t like that and I kept doing this for two years or so and I felt like we couldn’t trust each other because trust is a very important part of a relationship right so anyway I looked at my son and he was like SERIOUSLY MOM ARE YOU DRIVING and I was like YEAH AT LEAST IM GONNA TRY HAHA but then I thought about my husband again and I realized that we had both changed so much over the last couple of years so one day I just had to walk up to him and ask like DO YOU EVEN LIKE ME ANYMORE OR DO YOU LIKE WHO YOU THINK I AM and he was like well I’m not sure so I figured it wasn’t gonna work because I was tired of sneaking around it’s not me it’s not my style and now I’m a single mom and I drive a lot but you know it’s hard raising two kids on your own and this one time I had to walk and I had to pick up my kids from this woman’s house because I wanted to bake a cake and they were like NO COME WATCH SOCCER WITH US but I didn’t want to because I think they’re a bad influence on my children so I was like NO IM BAKING A CAKE and they were like SERIOUSLY THATS BORING so yeah oh and by the way the church is true and I say this in the name of Jesus Christ amen”
seriously, he got transported on Wednesday and I’ve been sobbing since. He hugged me and kept repeating “I don’t wanna leave”, and I was like “SO DON’T !!!!!!!” … but he had to, of course.
Seriously, if he doesn’t text me or anything I’m gonna have to call the church in the city he’s now serving in, and tell them to tell him that he’s not allowed to forget me.
Seriously. I will.
I just noticed that I’ve started three sentences with “seriously” … SERIOUSLY. I’m serious.